overwhelming

It is so overwhelming the thoughts in our heads.  Ken and I haven't slept well since Monday.  :( 

Today he contacted a lawyer.  We are waiting to see if he'd have a case or not.  The least they could have done was offer him severence pay to last until he hopefully found something.  In the meantime, we could have paid off the house and car so we'd have less payments going out and the more likelyhood we'd make it ok on unemployment and (ugh) foodstamps, but that way we could.  This way is not good.  Unemployment in Michigan maxes out at about $362 a week or something like that.  He of course made more than that and we were struggling with that.  $362 is less than a house payment.  Our rent is even more than our house payment and our car payment is a bit less than that.  And those payments will eat up about all the unemployment he will get.  Anyway, we'd take severence pay and move on if we could get it.  We'd take more if a lawyer thought we could.  Ken's brother and my brother both mentioned asking a lawyer, it can't hurt to ask.  We aren't looking to get rich, just get by.  We truly aren't sue happy, we just want what is fair and right. 

Blood, sweat and tears into that job over the years.  For the most part, he enjoyed going to work though, which was good.  He just got tired of putting up with the guy that eventually decided to "fire" him. 

So, tomorrow we are going to work on a resume.  We should have before this but quite frankly, the shock of it all is just starting to settle with both of us.  My sister said she'd help us with it. 

Christmas will be ok, it's after that, that I am worried about.  Funny how something can kick you in the ass like that isn't it? 

The other night Ken said something about watching It's a Wonderful Life.  Normally that would make me laugh, because we struggle, but we do somehow muddle through and I love my family.  That night, it made me cry.  We will watch it though and remember that it is a wonderful life, we just need to make it better  financially right now.

No matter what happens to us, I know it is always worse for someone else.  I have a kind, gentle loving husband and four healthy children.  The children that are grown are some of the best people I know.  :)  I am so proud of them.  If we have to give up the house, we can move in to a seedy motel close to here.  We would have to give Rocky away.  That is the worst case scenerio and I hate the thought of that. I don't see moving back home as an option.  My Mom's condition and the way I know my Dad would expect me to take care of her just would not work.  He is finally taking her to daycare twice a week and it's working out well.  He just complains about the $40 fee per day.  He likes to complain though. 

Well, that's it I think.  I can always come back if I need to vent more.  I just don't know what the heck to do at this point.